imagine if every time I started dating a polyamorous person, I gave up on the relationship because I compared our relationship to one they enjoyed with someone else - whether it's someone they had been with for years or someone they'd just started dating.
I think there was a moment when I had the full realization that a non-romantic partner could be as important to me as a romantic partner - which, when I type it out right now seems like, "well, duh..." but in that moment it felt like an epiphany.
It might feel like a good thing to wish that this was all over and that nobody would get hurt and that property wouldn't be vandalized, stolen, or burned; but it doesn't feel right - knowing that nothing will change until shit gets uncomfortable or inconvenient enough for those of us who don't seem to be willing to do the right thing until it affects us directly.
We need to have compassion for one another regardless of our individual circumstances. Comparing hardships is about as helpful as comparing partners – it’s not.
Season 2 Begins Now! In this mini episode I provide an update on what to expect from Season 2 of the podcast and share some thoughts on how the global Covid-19 pandemic will affect the nature of our relationships moving forward. Want to be a guest on Polyammering Season 2? Contact me! I want to… Continue reading Polyammering Podcast: S201: Season 2 Preview Mini Episode
Kindness is going to be the most valuable commodity we can share with one another...
That's when the forensic relationship accounting begins. Someone (usually the mono person in the relationship) begins looking at the relationship the way an accountant might view a business profit and loss statement. They are able to clearly see the benefits for their polyamorous partner, and perhaps even for their newfound metamour - but on their own end, all they see are big red expenses.
While I'm probably not the person to write the post that tells all the polycules ten surefire ways to avoid getting and transmitting coronavirus, I am the person that writes the post that tells all the polycules that the conversation about establishing your polycule's health and wellness protocols should be included in your polyamory starter-pack.
More often than not, when people avoid telling their partner something they know should tell them because they're worried it might cause a fight or a breakup, there's a chance their partner will consider it cheating.
What I know now, I know because I made some mistakes and learned from them. A lot of my guidelines work for me and not necessarily for other people.