. But when I parent my inner child - that little collection of her memories that I carry - I finally understand at how society, my family, and my beloved late husband had all molded into their version of who they wanted me to be.
Category: Loss and Grieving
Stories about loss and grief, usually pertaining to my experience as a young widow.
A New Chapter: Moving in with my metamour
I think there was a moment when I had the full realization that a non-romantic partner could be as important to me as a romantic partner - which, when I type it out right now seems like, "well, duh..." but in that moment it felt like an epiphany.
Adjusting to Change with Compassion and Authenticity
We need to have compassion for one another regardless of our individual circumstances. Comparing hardships is about as helpful as comparing partners – it’s not.
Move the Goal Post: On relationship “failures”
Imagine thinking that you failed at accepting polyamory in one sentence, and in the next being so fully accepting of his polyamorous identity that you're willing to end the relationship rather than try to force him to change.
A tale of two mournings
It's hard to reconcile mourning something that you know wouldn't be right for you anymore, even if it were here.
Let’s talk about the gremlins
This time of year has a tendency to present the perfect conditions for me to question everything about my life. It's not a great time for me to be alone, but it's when my instincts tell me to withdraw from having to be present anywhere where I have to put on a mask to hide what's going on inside.
How far I’ll go
This week has been extra-specially rough on my emotional state for many reasons, one of which is the expiration date of my time in this house. I hadn't cried about it yet until last night. Last night the tears came. Last night I said the words out loud, "I hope I made the right decision,"… Continue reading How far I’ll go
Non Sequitur – A Birthday Request
My birthday is coming this week. I'll be 39. Save the date for next year. There will be a celebration. But for this year, it's pretty low key. Back in my 20s I set the standard that I only celebrate the Zeros and the Fives with parties, but the rest of the birthdays pass by… Continue reading Non Sequitur – A Birthday Request
Can I talk to you about something serious for a sec?
Content warning: Death and death-related topics ahead I've heard my boss say, on more than one occasion, that "nobody gets out of life alive." She doesn't say a lot that's worth repeating, but this is one of her finest and most salient comments. We're all gonna die one day. And yes, many of us hope… Continue reading Can I talk to you about something serious for a sec?
Seven: On the occasion of my wedding anniversary
I wonder, had this been a relay and not a reboot, if he'd been around to meet you, how he would have felt about this quirky situation of ours?
polyammering 