Once upon a time I thought it was super duper important...
It's hard to reconcile mourning something that you know wouldn't be right for you anymore, even if it were here.
I would never have to enjoy my life without him. I would have my pepperoni forever. He made me happy. He loved me. I loved him. This whole pizza thing was making me hungry and confused.
The patterns exist and are recognizable. They are reinforced by the messages we consume, whether they are generated from the society's large-scale mononormative culture, or the small microcosms of polyamorous subcultures. We internalize and normalize them until we don't even see them anymore.
If I were a Phyllis, and the only type of "camping" that could work for me was one that included a 24-hour room service menu, 10,000 thread count sheets, and HBO access - then I think we can all agree that it's not really camping.
"My partner is extremely jealous. He cheats on me. He locks his phone but insists I keep mine unlocked and that he's allowed to check it whenever he likes. I can't be friends on facebook with any men who aren't related to me, I can never talk to any of my exes, and he is… Continue reading The Consequences of Consequence Free Devotion
Is there a better museum for rare and priceless experiences than words on a page? I could try to preserve all the details - how we began, how many strikes from which implements, how he moved me about the room, how taut the rope felt on my skin, and the way my thighs ached as… Continue reading The Exhibit
...the bottom line is - we don't hate the concept of polyamory. We just don't wanna be poly ourselves.
The most frequent statement I read from people trying to transition into polyamorous relationships for their partner is the sense that they feel like they are "not enough." Whenever I see that line, my heart sort of aches for them. I understand that feeling and where it comes from, but somehow it doesn't affect me… Continue reading The thing about not feeling “enough”
When you imagine your perfect relationship(s), it might be a little bit like a Jenga tower: an eighteen-story stack of 54 wood blocks; organized in pallets of three in alternating directions. It's all the pieces you want....like that mental checklist you have of what "happily ever after" is going to look like for you one… Continue reading Relationship Jenga