We've been socialized since birth to view everything in terms of "which is better, which is worse" and it's really difficult to unlearn that habit.
I would never have to enjoy my life without him. I would have my pepperoni forever. He made me happy. He loved me. I loved him. This whole pizza thing was making me hungry and confused.
I think the community wants to change in the way that I want to lose weight. Like magic, and overnight, without actually having to sacrifice anything it enjoys or put in any long term effort into the hard work and sweat it's going to take to build a new set of habits.
When you're saying "it's fine" and it's clearly not.
Do your ups and downs have forward motion -- or do you keep revisiting the same spot over and over again?
There's a saying I've been hearing from people in poly circles over the past couple of months, in regards to opening up a relationship: "It's best to take it at the pace of the slowest person." Last night I heard it in a sightly different way, "to take it at the pace of the slowest… Continue reading A Walk in the Desert: On taking things at the pace of the slowest person
There is a metric fuckton of self work that has to go into successful polyamory, whether you're on the mono side or the poly side.