Ethical Nonmonogamy | Polyamory, Loss and Grieving, Love & Relationships

Move the Goal Post: On relationship “failures”

Imagine thinking that you failed at accepting polyamory in one sentence, and in the next being so fully accepting of his polyamorous identity that you're willing to end the relationship rather than try to force him to change.

Ethical Nonmonogamy | Polyamory, Love & Relationships

My advice to the partner of a Leeroy Jenkins-style Polyamorist

There is a metric fuckton of self work that has to go into successful polyamory, whether you're on the mono side or the poly side.

Love & Relationships

Deconstructing the destruction: How Professor Snape and Lily Potter’s eyes can help you process your most recent breakup

I used to "fall in love" online every twenty-two minutes. That's an exaggeration, but suffice it to say that as a very young adult (and sometimes teenager) I would meet people online and start developing emotional attachments to them very quickly. It was easy to do this. I didn't know they snored. Or subscribed to… Continue reading Deconstructing the destruction: How Professor Snape and Lily Potter’s eyes can help you process your most recent breakup

Ethical Nonmonogamy | Polyamory, Kinkstuff, Love & Relationships

The Collar

I have lots of collars.  Lots and lots and lots.  They're accessories, though, like the many many rings i have and wear when I'm dressing up for a special occasion. But not like the rings I keep tucked in a special box in my jewelry drawer:  my engagement and wedding rings. Those are different.  Those… Continue reading The Collar

Erotica, Kinkstuff, Love & Relationships

The Photograph

It had arrived gift wrapped on her 29th birthday. A tarnished silver 5x7 frame holding the only remaining copy of a photograph taken years earlier.  Enclosed was a simple, unsigned note:   Remember that once upon a time, you were cherished. She’d thrown the framed photo back into the padded envelope it had arrived in… Continue reading The Photograph

Loss and Grieving, Love & Relationships

Vignettes in Perspective

The good girl never wins.