Ethical Nonmonogamy | Polyamory, Love & Relationships

Holiday stress and polyamory

By now (if you're in the United States), you've likely had at least one conversation about how your polycule is going to handle Thanksgiving (or Friendsgiving), and I'm guessing there's more than a handful of hinge partners out there that are starting to feel the pressure of multiple paramours vying for spots on the holiday calendar.

Kinkstuff, Politics

Tourists in Dropland

Those of us who've spent some time in the kink/BDSM world are eventually educated on the concept of "drop." Google "BDSM drop" and you'll get over 770,000 mostly relevant results. After an extreme experience, there's a period of time that last hours or days, or depending on the longevity or intensity of the experience -… Continue reading Tourists in Dropland

Loss and Grieving

For me, it was Anton Yelchin

We lost a lot of our heroes, idols, role models, and artists this year. For many people, a David Bowie, a Harper Lee, an Alan Rickman, a Muhammad Ali, or a Carrie Fisher might have been the person they could look to in an isolating world and feel less alone. Did you know Alan Rickman… Continue reading For me, it was Anton Yelchin

Love & Relationships

Where your friends call home

Content warning: Suicide & Depression* *This all happened yesterday.  The friend I speak about in this post has been found alive, and has made a decision to get help.  We're all very relieved and supportive.  I'm leaving this post the way I wrote it before we knew for sure. A friend posted his suicide note… Continue reading Where your friends call home

Love & Relationships, Self-Discovery

Learning to love without solutions: further insights from a recovering codependent

Many years ago, I had a friend, Brian, who went through therapy and was able to accept that he had codependent tendencies. With his therapist, he began to set boundaries, and by talking about it with his friends, he kept cementing the new value-set in his brain. Problem was, Brian turned into a bit of… Continue reading Learning to love without solutions: further insights from a recovering codependent

Loss and Grieving, Love & Relationships

Vignettes in Perspective

The good girl never wins.