Once upon a time I thought it was super duper important...
There's a little voice in my head that asks "Why do you feel like you have anything more/different to offer than anybody else who is already doing it?"
The subject of hierarchy comes up often in poly discussion groups. People generally fall into the camps of "hierarchy is fine" or "hierarchy is evil" and usually those who fall into the former are at the top of the pyramid, and those in the latter have been burned by being at the bottom. I think… Continue reading Some thoughts on Hierarchy vs Couples Privilege
Everything in my life lately is a metaphor for dating and relationships. New Job I was recruited for a new job. I went on one interview. Then another. Then another. Between the second and third interviews I had trouble getting their attention to schedule a time (the third interview was at their request). And then… Continue reading Everything in my life lately is a metaphor for dating and relationships
The most painful part of my monthly waxing isn't the part where she's ripping the hair out my most sensitive places. It's having to maintain a conversation with her for the two hours I spend on her table. Yes, two hours. She's meticulous. She's "tweezers to the ass crack" meticulous. This is why I put… Continue reading The Frustration with French Fries
When talking about polystuff, I've often heard (or read) that "time is finite; love is not." When someone has multiple partners, the amount of time they can spend with any particular one is going to have limitations, because there is time they want and should spend with another one. However, time is not a useful… Continue reading Time and the Diamond Trade
First, I'll establish my credentials: I'm a monogamous (or mono-amorous) person in a relationship with a polyamorous man. My monogamy is my choice, not necessarily his preference just as his polyamory is his choice, not necessarily my preference. We've been at it for just over a year now and it's going really swell. I have,… Continue reading Change your Cookbook: A monogamuggle’s guide to cookin’ with polyfolk
The other day, I read the words "I deserve to be surrounded by people who appreciate me..." and saw a writing in which someone wrote a letter to her partner's partners. Two different writings that I've since lost track of. So, with the full disclosure of where this particular writing is coming from, understand that… Continue reading A love letter to my friends
The topic of the "Veto" came up recently in conversation. While engaging in very healthy communication and negotiation with a new partner, a friend of mine was told that their partner's wife had "limited veto power." Which made the collective group go *gulp*. My friend communicated back (because yay communication!) for clarification on what "limited… Continue reading I Choo Choo Choose You!
Clamps one and two were fastened to each nipple from the top; the chain lifted and inserted into her mouth where it was held between clenched teeth. Clamps three and four, also each attached to her nipples, but from the bottom. The chain lay resting against her belly. He hovered over her. A third chain… Continue reading Can you tell me how to get…