Once or twice a year I let my mind wander and imagine what it would be like to have another romantic relationship in addition to the amazing one I'm already in.
I would never have to enjoy my life without him. I would have my pepperoni forever. He made me happy. He loved me. I loved him. This whole pizza thing was making me hungry and confused.
There was that one time when he had me tied up and was in the middle of sexytimes with me when she called...
I want to do it again. I want to understand why last night my tolerance for pain was so high I couldn't feel any of it; where other nights the sting of a slap on the ass makes the walls turn white.
The patterns exist and are recognizable. They are reinforced by the messages we consume, whether they are generated from the society's large-scale mononormative culture, or the small microcosms of polyamorous subcultures. We internalize and normalize them until we don't even see them anymore.
What if where you are in your life is EXACTLY where you're supposed to be right now? What would that be like, to stop comparing your current location to a perceived end-game?
people often mistake the hormonal amplification of a feeling as a sign the feeling has no merit at all, when it might be at the root of something that's been bubbling under the surface for a long time.